Thursday, 5 October 2017

Vet and Duck Humour

Going through my archives, came across an old duck humour story...I think all animal lovers can relate to this one !   Enjoy....

 The Dead Duck Story.

A woman brought a very limp duck into a veterinary surgery clinic. As she
placed her pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope
and listened to the bird's chest. After a moment or two, the vet shook his head sadly and said, "I'm so sorry, your duck has passed away."

The distressed owner wailed, "Are you sure?" "Yes, I am sure. The duck is
dead," he replied. "How can you be so sure?" she protested. "I mean, you haven't done any testing on him or anything. He might just be in a coma or something."

The vet rolled his eyes, turned around and left the room. He
returned a few moments later with a black Labrador Retriever. As the duck's owner looked on in amazement, the dog stood on his hind legs,  put his front paws on the examination table and sniffed the duck from top to bottom. He then looked at the vet with sad eyes and shook
his head. The vet patted the dog on the head and led him out of the room.
A few minutes later, he returned with a cat. The cat jumped
 up on the table and sniffed delicately at the bird. The cat sat back on its haunches, shook its head, meowed softly and strolled out of the room.
The vet looked at the woman and said, "I'm sorry, but as I said, this is most definitely, 100 percent a dead duck." Then the  vet turned to his computer terminal, hit a few keys and produced a bill, which he handed to the woman.
The duck's owner, still in shock, took the bill for £300 and
gasped. "£300 just to tell me my duck is dead!"

The vet shrugged. "I'm sorry Miss. If you'd taken my word for it the first time, the bill would have been £30. But with the Lab report and the cat scan, it's now £300. ☺☺

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